Not long after after my sweet wife, Geneva, died, I was dreaming one night and heard two people talking, one person was bringing up names of people I knew who had died. “What about so and so?” The answer came, “They are safe, they are with me.” I was fascinated by these questions and answers. I had to see who was taking, when I looked, the one answering the questions was Jesus, Himself. To my surprise, the one asking was myself, I was there in the third person and totally caught up in this conversation. When I walked in closer I entered my body and began to see Jesus face to face through my own eyes. That explains why I didn’t fall down and worship Him as I would have wanted, I didn’t want to interrupt. I finished my list of people who had died, but the exact list was taken from me, I only know who I would have asked about, my wife included and some of our church members. Every one of the people I asked about, Jesus said they were with Him, so that was a great relief to me.
He reach out to hug me goodbye and in doing so, I found myself with my chin on his right shoulder and there was His ear, inches from my mouth! He had a beard, but not long hair as most paintings show, he was a bit taller than my 5 foot, 9 inch frame, I half whispered to Him, “What about me, Lord, will I make it? To my shock, He fell silent, where the conversation had been so free before, I craned my neck back to see His face, there was no anger there, but no answer! We were still hugging, I pleaded, “Why won’t you answer me, Lord?” Instead of a verbal answer, he gave me a squeeze as if to end our embrace, as my wife and I would have done if one of us were parting for a season. But, when he did that he planted the answer into my heart without a word.
I said, “I know why you’re not answering me, Lord! If you told me I wasn’t going to make it, that would take all the wind out of my sails, If you told me I was going to make it, I’d get right smug with myself, I’d probably slack right off (from being careful of my faith), wouldn’t I? I know what I’ve got to do, Lord, I’ve got to keep on keeping on!” At this point, I awoke from sleep and had several scriptures to look up. I still have a “Know so” faith, but we have to make sure today, that we are doing God’s will, and heed the warnings given in His word.
Hebrews 9:27 And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment: (I had asked to be judged before my death, not allowed! It was allowed for the thief on the cross, but his death was near, even that day.)
Philippians 3:7 But what things were gain to me, those I (Paul) counted loss for Christ. 3:8 Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ, 3:9 And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith: 3:10 That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death; 3:11 If by any means I might attain unto the resurrection of the dead. 3:12 Not as though I had already attained, either were already perfect: but I follow after, if that I may apprehend that for which also I am apprehended of Christ Jesus. 3:13 Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, 3:14 I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. 3:15 Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded: and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, God shall reveal even this unto you.
God did for me exactly what Paul said, If Paul wasn’t told, why should I be told?, I needed this lesson, but most of all I needed that hug!